I almost didn't write!

We are back home now from LF.  G'pa hussled us playing Dice last night - it was fun.  He also discussed Bible Verses with us too - we didn't read any (which I was surprised about a little bit) but he knew the verses I gave him and said that two of them were some of his favorite for weddings - well when we looked them up when we got home (John actually hadn't read them yet as I'm the one that did the research) they both talk about the same things.  It's looking like Ephesians 5:23-33, something from Genesis (paper isn't in front of me, I remember Ephesians because that was one G'pa liked) and one from John... I'll try to remember the specifics tomorrow - for me if for no other reason!  lol

G'pa talked about his Cancer and treatment a little bit - in blurbs here and there - G'ma seems to not want him to talk about it/focus on it - either in front of us or at all, I'm not sure.  I'm sure she doesn't want to be thinking about it either and it makes G'pa cry...

He has completed his first round of chemo which will be administered every four weeks through February, and has completed 13 days of radiation with fourteen more to go?  Something like that.  I thought they said 28 total which means one more day, but who knows.  And then he got choked up when he said something about maybe needing radiation on his brain.  First I've heard of this and G'ma hushed him up right away, maybe because it choked him up or because it's a recent development and not everyone knows?  She said they're not sure - but if it's brought up by the doctors, I'm thinking it's likely... I'm just not that optimistic I guess, and I have to make sure it's been mentioned to my dad - so I'll talk to my mom about it first.  And after G'pa went to bed G'ma in passing (how you talk about cancer in passing I don't know, but she does it!) mentions that the type he has could be every where?  Of course not enough info spoken for me to make much of a conclusion about.  Just trying not to really think about it and focus on how well he's doing.  Losing hair every day, but he's certainly not bald yet!  lol  I'm very glad we hung out with them this weekend, even if for a short time.  He's tired too, so I really didn't feel that bad about leaving too soon. 

Got to hold the two week old little baby today - both John & I did.  Logan is precious in a little pumpkin t-shirt - just so cute!  Gave me a wee bit of baby fever.  hehe. So cute.  No babies for a couple of years we are hoping - but I guess, don't always get to plan that.  Super precious though.

I think that's all I've got tonight - gotta save something to blog about tomorrow.

<3 & prayers to miss Kim - Definitely shed some tears for you today.  <3 

We'll see if I can actually write everyday for the rest of the countdown - that would be quite impressive given the last couple of years and my neglection of Xanga.  I read you guys everyday, I just don't write.

Last night we finally got back to our premarital counseling after about a month off.  Pastor had surgery on his leg in the meantime along with all my sickness and well, it just didn't work until now.  We all agree that whatever we don't get through before, we will continue on after the wedding.  He also finally received our Prepare and Enrich survey comparison results back - it is a wonderful thing!  I recommend everyone does this.  We are his guinnea pigs with the online version which is so much more customizable and also with the Christian version as the one he used previously on paper was the 2000 Secular version.  I'm glad we took the Pentecostal version because it's important to me that John and I discuss how we feel about our Spirituality in front of the Pastor - and I'm glad it's his Pastor.

So, last night we had 10 categories and each of us (on our own) had to mark three strengths and three "Growths".  We actually matched on a couple, including our first strength which was "Conflict Resolution".  Pastor said that is most often a Growth for all couples and even the survey results showed that we have that as a strength.  Interestingly enough, my first Growth was "Communication" which you would think would be needed to have good conflict resolution BUT it's our lack of understanding communication that leads to resolving conflicts.  hehe. 

Learned a lot of interesting things - we were there for almost 2.5 hours, and it didn't seem like it - realizing that a lot of our relationship issues to work on stem from John's lack of confidence - and that I have a good self-confidence.  That John is introverted but likes to go out to social events, where as I am very extroverted and prefer to stay home, how odd a combination that is.  Also, that I was 90% Stressed and John is 95% stressed - so not good!  It was just great.  I'm so thankful for this.

This weekend we are going to LF so that we can keep my G'pa and G'ma company on Nicky's wedding day.  With G'pa's cancer & treatment he isn't able to travel down to Texas so my parents are going and I figured that they would be bummed so we would come and "cheer" them up.  I'm bringing a list of Bible verses that I like for the service to pick the Pastor's brain on his thoughts.  I figured it might make him happy to discuss these things, plus it's good to keep his mind moving.  My uncle sounds very hopeful and optimistic about radiation and chemo working for Grandpa - yet I have a sinking feeling of dread, like when will the shoe drop.  When people have sickness for a long time and their death is expected I usually feel happy for the family that at least they knew it was coming and that these people are no longer suffering - but I don't feel that way anymore.  Knowing that it's imminent (not that it's not for all of us) that someone isn't going to be around much longer isn't good.  Hopefully after this weekend I'll just start feeling better about it.

This weekend we also have finishing touches to buy or at least price so that my parents can transfer one lump sum.  I will be burning up the credit card tonight.  Eek.

I think that's enough - maybe I'll have a gooooood update tomorrow night

*~**  Shake Your Booty **~*

Wow!  I'm getting married in 43 days!  It's crazy how fast this goes.  43 days seems like a lot to me right now actually, but I know it's really not.

I have to gather pricing info for the remaining purchases:
My underclothes
My wrap (it's white faux fur with a satin lining being handmade for me by my "seamstress")
My shoes
Plates, cups for the reception
Veggie/Meat/Cheese/Cracker trays for cocktail hour
Buttermints, Peanuts & M&M's for the reception
Silver Trays (plastic of course) for the pizzas to be placed on
Printed programs to be assembled with the background paper we had custom cut this week
DJ
Photographer
LF Floral for the altar flowers
Favor wrappers - and purchase the mini hershey bars
photo paper for the guest book
ink for the photo printers for the guest book

Ack, there's probably more but you get the idea - it's pretty much little stuff left (other than fulfilling the priced contracts with DJ & photos).

So crazy.

And I still have a sore throat a week later.  My theory is that my allergies are kicking my butt.  We bought a humidifier for the bedroom - I'm actually thinking we might need to buy one for the main portion of the apt as well. 

My doctor had said I could double up on my allergy pills when they get bad - but that freaks me out, can I really?

I slept sitting up on the couch last night with my machine on for most of the evening.  I did wake up more than I wanted to but I didn't feel any anxiety like I did the night before in my bed.  Which I didn't write about so that reference doesn't mean too much.  Wednesday night I tried sleeping with my mask on.  Laid down at 10 and every 5 minutes for the next half hour I was feeling anxious and having to calm myself down.  My breathing was bothering me.

I realized last night it's because I'm so stuffy!  John & I were just laying on the bed earlier in the evening and I started to feel a little panicky - and it's cuz I couldn't breath well.  I might have to sleep sitting up for a little while until this crud clears out.

Tomorrow is my bridal shower!  Directly following is the Bachelorette Party.  John's Bachelore party is tomorrow night as well.  I'm excited!

Did I tell you guys that someone bought my mixer?  I've been trying really hard to not keep looking to see what's been purchased but I haven't really had a lot of luck.  lol  I'm still trying though!  Anyway, the first time I looked, I saw that someone had bought my mixer and I'm SO excited!  I have wanted this for my whole life! 

We also received our first gift via UPS - one of the oval Rachel Ray pans that I registered for.  Nice!  But it didn't say who it was from.... so hopefully John's mom will know - I'm assuming it will be from one of his relatives.

I should probably go get ready and get my butt into work.

Oh wait, speaking of butts.  Apparently mine is far too heavy.  Argh!  Our toilet seat cracked a month or so ago, and recently the crack went all the way through so it could pinch you- not comfy, obviously. So we put in a work order on Tuesday night.  On Wednesday they replaced it.  On Wednesday night, just sitting there, I hear *pop*  WHAT?!?!  So I get up and sure enough, cracked one side of the seat, all the way through. I was so irritated.  But it gets better!  Later that evening, the other side did it too so now when you sit down you have to hold on to it or the front half of the seat falls off!  I called yesterday morning to explain the situation and that while I recognize I am not a light person, I am 28 years old and I've never had this happen to my whole life.  I don't know if we got the bad one of the bunch or if a better quality needs to be purchased - but it needs to get done.  Even explained that the seat is all the way broken off ... guess what still wasn't replaced when I got home.  I will call again today around lunch time if John tells me it still hasn't been done.

Now I will go finish getting ready - after my toilet pinches my ass.

Would you please go away?  I've never been this sick girl... I must have been replaced.  If we get replaced shouldn't we be able to at least get more done?

Sore throat is back for a 4th appearance in the last 6 weeks... but with the other crap coming on with the sore throat, and because I don't see white stuff in the back, I think it's just a regular type of cold.  I woke up this morning and my tongue really felt like sandpaper, it was gross.

And I'm awake right now because I woke up to take another dose of Dayquil.  And Advil, drink some water and EmergenC then back to bed for me.

How is everyone doing?  Been trying to keep up with reading, still not getting around to comment as much as I probably should.  But I do read.  Every day.  lol

We sent out invites this week.  I had John drop them at the post office and didn't give him good instructions - so he dropped them in the box instead of going to the counter to have them processed by hand.  Out of 120 (in the first batch, we ran out of stamps!) 23 came back for $.20 additional postage because the wax seal was too thick to get it through the "measuring" slot.  If John understood correctly, we could pay the additional $.20/invite and they would be processed by hand OR add an additional stamp to move it into the next size up of measuring slots.  Guess which we chose.  lol 

I made all of the invites.  I did have help, but I created them... so I was quite proud, they are beautiful.  And to have 23 of them come back with a black stamp of death requesting more money severely irritated me, especially when some of the returned ones had a removable sticker with the same request so there is actually a product that won't ruin my envelopes.  As my mom said, these things happen and people understand and they don't save the envelope.  I wasn't about to spend the time trying to get the unused stamp off the old envelopes, print more address labels... so I just had John add the postage.  Dang it.  My pretty ivory envelope.  lol

Well my water is gone so I guess it's back to bed for me.  We are having an allergy treatment for minerals with our chiro this morning - after which we have to stay away from metal & minerals for 25 hours... also suggested that we have a technology free 25 hours as well.  SO until tomorrow after 11AM, we won't be around our comps, cells or tvs.  I hope I have a good book to read!  We plan on doing a lot of sleeeeeping.

Love you guys!  Have a great weekend!

I've been very lucky in my life.  My whole 28 (*shush*) years of life, and I have four grandparents still living.  I met three of my great grandparents, one only three years gone.

Last week, or a couple weeks ago, I found out that my g'pa the Pastor had a mass of some sort and had to have a biopsy this week.  They had the meeting with an Oncologist today (is that the right doctor?)  It's on his lung.  If he refused Kemo they gave him two months, with Kemo, 18.  He's had prostate cancer for 10 + years.  He looked really sad tonight.

He did choose Kemo - starts next week.  But he was informed by the doctor that traveling to TX at the end of October for my cousin's wedding is not allowed.  I'm not sure he's going to get to marry us.  He should be able to be there but wow.

Wow.

My dad is sad.  I'm sad.  I don't even know if my mom knows the results - hoping dad told her.

*****
Tomorrow  Later today is the surprise baby shower for one of my best friends.  She has no clue so far - I'm very excited.  Hoping it's easy to pop into happy mode and just stay there.  Our time on earth is decided before we're born - all we can do is live and enjoy life has healthfully and happily as possible while we're here.

So glad my grandparents moved back to MN from NM - I actually got to know them a little bit now, not just OF them.